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What Your Matching Underwear Says About You

What Your Matching Underwear Says About You

portrait of Kate Kittredge
Kate Kittredge

Maybe you’re one of those women who just has to match her bra and underwear set—and we mean pretty much exactly: nude with nude, black with black, or a lace bra with the matching cheekies that it came with. Or, instead of being matchy-matchy, perhaps you treat your underwear drawer like a grab-bag, willing to be surprised (and hopefully delighted) by the quirky pairings fate offers up. There is no wrong or right here, but how you roll underwear-wise could say something about your personality.

Match like a boss

“For some women, not wearing a matched set ruins their day—even though no one can see it!” says fashion psychologist Dawnn Karen, founder of the Fashion Psychology Institute and a professor at the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City. “That indicates a somewhat controlled, particular, and perfectionist personality.” [note: Fashion Psychology is the study of how color, style, shape, and image affect human behavior, while addressing cultural norms and sensitivities.] Women who feel strongly about matching are likely to be bosses or leaders, she adds, and maybe…even a little bit domineering.

“Matching your sets, especially if they’re colorful, says you are confident and stylish,” according to stylist Jenny Altman, a lingerie expert and founder of, a website all about intimate apparel. “Women tell me that they don’t do it for the men or partners in their lives, but rather for their own feeling of fabulousness and because it makes them feel great.”

Non-matchers are more creative

The non-matchers, according to Karen, tend to be creative types. “It’s not a negative,” she says, “but they’re usually more likely to have a go-with-the-flow personality. They don’t need a lot of order; they actually find structure in not having structure. If a room is too neat, they feel a loss of control. They enjoy being part of a group rather than in charge.” Non-matchers can fall into the “I don’t care” camp or, says Altman, it could be that they do care…about how things feel (how they look: not so much). “‘These people wear their most comfortable bra and panty, separately—whether or not they match or are part of a set,” she says. “This choice is about function and practicality rather than style.”

“One trend that has changed in recent years is how we match,” Altman says. “It used to be that sets were the exact same color, style, and fabric, etc. Now a set can be a bra and panty that just ‘go’ together—more like clothing. It can be a plum-colored bra and a printed panty with some plum in it. Sets can be fun and very personalized.”

And sometimes it does matter if someone besides yourself is going to be there when you dress or undress, according to Karen. “If someone else is going to see your underwear, especially at the beginning of a relationship,” she says, “you’re more likely to try to match. You’re trying to put your best foot (or other body parts!) forward.”

Our go-to bra and panty sets

Here are some ThirdLove parings we think are perfect matches. Wear them together for an extra confidence boost and powerhouse outfit only you know about. Side note, they mix pretty darn well too. It all depends on you:

The Black, 24/7 Balconette and the Black, Lace Back Cheeky
The Taupe, 24/7™ Classic Strapless Bra and the Taupe, Lace High Brief
The Sea Salt, 24/7™ Pima Cotton T-Shirt Bra and the Sea Salt, Pima Cotton Thong
The Earl Grey, 24/7™ Lace Contour Plunge Bra and the Earl Grey, Lace Back Cheeky

Perfectly mismatched pairs

We love playing with colors, textures, and silhouettes when coming up with fun combos. With so many types of bras and types of underwear, why not?

The Black 24/7™ Lace Back T-Shirt Bra and the Mocha, Comfort Stretch Bikini
The Soft Pink, Front Closure Lace Racerback and the Black, Pima Cotton Hipster
The Ballet, Seamless Lounge Bra and the Taupe, Everyday Lace Bikini
The Fig, 24/7 Perfect Coverage Bra and the Sienna, Comfort Stretch Bikini

Additional reporting by Aimee Kinder. 

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